Family Home Alone Evening, Part 4

Song: Hymn 19, "We Thank Thee, O God, for a Prophet"

Prayer: Me!

Lesson: read from Brad Wilcox's The Continuous Conversion

• Takeaway: we turn away from the natural man the moment we turn back to God. In other words, we are righteous even when we are imperfect because seeking God is righteousness, no matter where we are on the path to Him.

Activity: singing karaoke-style to Mexican pop songs to strengthen Spanish skills (gracias, Jesse y Joy)

Treat: Tums, because dinner was chili with jalapenos

The Miracle of Enough

I got clued in to the "Miracle of Enough" by Laurel Christensen Day's talk at Women's Conference in 2015. She explains that she misinterpreted the miracle of the loaves and fishes to mean that Christ multiplied the meager food in order to fill the five thousand. However, when you examine the scriptural records of this miracle, not a single one of them--not Matthew nor Mark nor Luke nor John--uses the word "multiply." Sister Day suggests that the food was not changed to fill the people but that the people were changed to be filled by the food. They ate a little, and it was enough. She calls this the Miracle of Enough.

I experience this miracle on a daily basis. So many times, I have waited for blessings that never came or answers that weren't what I wanted or expected them to be. In those times, God has helped me to take comfort in what the blessings I already have, the blessings I was designed to have, even though they weren't the blessings I thought I needed. He has given me the challenge of counting my blessings so that I will realize that I have enough.

The most dramatic example of this miracle involves my work at the Provo Temple. We have the busiest shift in one of the busiest temples, and sometimes there just aren't enough workers to complete the work...or so it seems. God makes sure that His work gets done, one way or another, and our small workforce is always enough under His power. It's the Miracle of Enough.

One of my favorite scriptures also testifies of this miracle. There are two versions of the scripture, which was originally part of the Sermon on the Mount. Matthew 6:34 states, "Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof." I used to understand this verse to mean, "Don't worry about tomorrow; today is hard enough to take care of without trying to take of tomorrow, as well." But the version of this verse in the Book of Mormon sends a starkly different message. 3 Nephi 13:34 reads, "Sufficient is the day unto the evil thereof." In other words, "I will give you enough strength and enough power to handle the trials of the day." It is a promise from Christ to perform the Miracle of Enough. Sufficient is the day. Isn't that beautiful?

And this miracle works both ways. Not only are God's offerings enough but He makes our offerings enough. A few days ago, I made an offer on a lovely house. The sellers ultimately accepted a better offer. It was enlightening to realize that God's ways are different from the world's ways. In the world, our offerings will never be enough. We are imperfect, and the world demands perfection. Instant perfection, much of the time. But God takes our imperfect offerings and makes them perfect. He accepts the widow's mite, a small and imperfect offering, and He makes it enough. That, too, is the Miracle of Enough.

Have you witnessed the Miracle of Enough? How has it affected your relationship with God?

May Favorites

I only have one favorite this month. READING! With a lighter teaching load this month, I've been devouring books to satiate my appetite for words. With several visits to the library each week and several more visits to the fitness center (where I have been doing most of my reading), I read or listened to at least 8 books in May.

Listens

1. A Conjuring of Light by V. E. Schwab
2. Code Name Verity by Elizabeth Wein

Reads

1. On Slim Unaccountable Bones by Emma Lou Thayne
2. The Class from the Black Lagoon by Mike Thaler
3. The Final Solution by Michael Chabon
4. Star Wars: Guardians of the Whills by Greg Rucka
5. The Lifted Veil by George Eliot
6. Brother Jacob by George Eliot

Of all these books, the one I would recommend the most highly is Code Name Verity, a book that I read last year, too. It is the story of two best friends during World War II: a British spy and a British pilot. They get shot down over France near the end of the country's Nazi occupation and are instrumental in the liberation of one particular city. Oh, and they're both women. And it's sad. But my favorite aspect of this book is the clever structure: for most of the book, you are reading what the spy is writing to her Nazi captors. That first-person narrative displays her unique personality whilst also hiding lies and secrets and maybe even code. You'll laugh and you'll cry and you'll want a best friend like Julie or Maddie to invade enemy territory with you.

The Nelson Challenge: In His Name

I've been following President Nelson's challenge to study the words, actions, doctrines, prophecies, and commandments of Christ every week. Here is something I studied recently.

Lesson #5

In the Church, we do a lot of things in the name of Jesus Christ. So, what does that mean? And how can it help me turn unto Christ in every thought? How can it help me to learn more of Him and to gain a stronger witness of His power and divinity?

As I was studying, I came across this conference talk by Elder L. Edward Brown in April 1997 titled "Pray Unto the Father in My Name." Elder Brown says,

We we use these sacred words, "In the name of Jesus Christ,"...we are on holy ground. We are using a name most sublime, most holy, and most wonderful--the very name of the Son of God. What power and reassurance and peace come when we really pray in His name. This conclusion may be the most important part of prayer.

He references Moses 1:21, where Moses says, "In the name of the Only Begotten, depart hence, Satan."

We can send Satan hence if we live in the name of Jesus Christ. We not only pray in His name, but we act in His name. We represent Him, for we have made a covenant at baptism to take upon us His name. We become the undershepherds on the path to become like the true and living Shepherd. To do things in the name of Jesus Christ means to act like Him.

During a beautiful Easter lesson last Sunday, I made a list of things I do or can do in His name:

• In His name, I kneel in prayer.
• In His name, I praise God.
• In His name, I thank God.
• In His name, I seek blessings.
• In His name, I protect my family.
• In His name, I use my talents.
• In His name, I serve His disciples.
• In His name, I serve His abusers.
• In His name, I bless others.
• In His name, I answer prayers.
• In His name, I will live again.
• In His name, I change into a better person.
• In His name, I rise.

Because of my baptismal covenant, renewed every week at the sacrament table, I walk and talk in name of Jesus Christ. I represent Him in everything I do, emphasizing the need for repentance if I do something wrong and thereby misrepresent Him. When I'm at work, I work in His name. When I'm eating, I eat in His name. If I truly keep this covenant, my thoughts will automatically turn to the Savior for whom and by whom I do everything. He is the reason I can do so many good things to build up the kingdom of God. He is also the reason I will do so many good things. 

I can also learn more about the Savior by acting in His name. It makes me think about what He would do or wouldn't do, especially in His relationship with God. My prayers are a lot more reverent and sacred when I pray as Jesus, the Beloved Son, would pray. I'm a lot less selfish and a lot more hopeful when I seek blessings and answers. Acting in His name gives me the confidence to know that I can be perfect like Him someday.

The Nelson Challenge: Lamb of God

I've been following President Nelson's challenge to study the words, actions, doctrines, prophecies, and commandments of Christ every week. Here is something I studied recently.

Lesson #4

What are these which are arrayed in white robes? and whence came they?

...These are they which came out of great tribulation, and have washed their robes, and made them white in the blood of the Lamb. 

Therefore are they before the throne of God, and serve him day and night in his temple...

For the Lamb which is in the midst of the throne shall feed them, and shall lead them unto living fountains of waters: and God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes.

Revelations 7:13-15, 17

Every Saturday, I exchange floral shirts and pencil skirts for a long white dress, the uniform of a temple worker. On one of my first shifts, I found an oil smudge on my sleeve, and another woman directed me to the laundry facility in the temple basement. There I was taught how to use a powerful stain remover. First, I had to apply the chemical, which came in the form of a glue stick, to the stain. Then, I had to place a white cloth underneath the stain and rub vigorously across the stain with a wet cloth. The stain would be pushed out of my dress and transferred to the white cloth underneath. 

Of course, I was in the temple the whole time, so the symbolism of that small event shone through to me. We wear white clothes in the temple because they represent the Savior cleaning us with his blood. He transferred the stains of our sins onto himself and purged them away with his power and his sacrifice. 

L'Innocence, William-Adolphe Bouguereau (1893)

Jesus Christ is the Lamb of God, the lamb that was led to the slaughter and slain. He is gentle and innocent, as we are encouraged to be. It's no wonder that, with his divine and loving perspective, he asks us to feed his lambs, for he sees the true potential of the rough and the guilty. We really can be like him because of his willingness to save us and teach us. He is so patient with our shortcomings, even when we make the same mistakes over and over again. The Lamb of God wants to raise us up from the mud and the dust; he wants to clean our robes so that we can go on to do marvelous works.

That is what I am celebrating this Easter week: that I can enter the temple, the house of God, because of the sacrifice of the Lamb. That I can serve my sisters, both living and dead, because of the innocence of my Brother. That I can rise from my failures to become divine because of my Savior.

I wear white in the temple because I am continually cleansed by the blood of the Lamb.

April 2017 General Conference Wrap-up

I'm always amazed by the power of General Conference. Divine instruction on dozens of subjects arrives on my little computer screen, directly to me it seems. I find answers to the questions that I ask and answers to the questions I didn't think to ask. Answers I didn't realize that I needed until I received them. General Conference is a modern-day miracle.

This time around, I found some meaningful patterns in the messages. Keeping in mind that everyone notices different things depending on the Spirit's guidance, here are some of my takeaways.

Lead with Love

• President Uchtdorf asked us to motivate people (including ourselves) using the pure love of Christ instead of using fear. We are to follow the Savior's own example of encouraging people to keep his commandments. "If ye love me, keep my commandments," and not "if ye fear me."
• Elder Christofferson followed up by asking us not to create a shame culture or a guilt culture when we call people to repentance. He said that to warn people, which would seem to use fear, is actually to care about people. When we warn of consequences, we should do it out of love for our neighbor. The admonition in D&C 121:41 about the gentleness of our power came up several times during conference.
• Elder Palmer used the scriptural example of the rich young man asking Christ what more he could do. "Then Jesus beholding him loved him," and asked him to change and improve. His call to repentance was born out of love--and out of beholding him, which was explained by...
• President Eyring in both the women's session and the priesthood session as he emphasized the divine identities of the people around us. In the women's session, he shared a parenting experience when the Spirit told him his son was a great person, and that experience led President Eyring to be more gentle. He treated his son with even more love.

Leading with love is one way to become like God. As He mentors us, we can mentor others. We are all placed in our own human orbit, where God has given us specific individuals to mentor and to serve. In my own circumstances, I am keenly aware of the people He wants me to love, and I am also keenly aware that I should be doing that loving work better. Therefore, I am adding a special prayer every day to be filled with the pure love of Christ.

Look unto Christ in Every Thought

• President Nelson encouraged us to take on the mentally rigorous practice of looking unto Christ in every thought (D&C 6:36). He explained how he is trying to do that by studying Christ in the Bible's Topical Guide (the President Nelson challenge that I have been writing about). He clarified that we should not speak of the Atonement or the Resurrection, which were just events, without tying them to Jesus Christ, who is our actual Savior. President Nelson also invited us to study "The Living Christ."
• Elder Ballard also encouraged us to study "The Living Christ."
• Elder Bragg said that we all have an inherent inclination toward light. He also said that the light of Christ is in all things. From these statements, I infer that we can look unto Christ by seeking out His light around us. I can search for evidence of Christ's love and power in the beauty of the world and in the beauty of his disciples.
• Elder Choi warned that, when we seek the light of Christ, we should not look around but look up. He emphasized again that we should look up to Christ in every thought. Looking around suggests having a narrow perspective and caring about the opinions of the Babylon. Looking up, in contrast, suggests that we have Christ and his goals in mind while we dwell here in Babylon. Looking up, I imagine, will lead us to serve and "heed them not."
• Elder Oaks said that the effort to know God continues well beyond the veil of death. While we can begin to know Christ, and the Father whom he represents, we will learn more as we live with him.
• Elder Costa taught us that nothing draws us closer to Christ than the desire to change. That desire is our part of the repentance process. As a person who loves to improve, I hope that love is drawing me closer to my Savior.

Clearly, I need to study "The Living Christ" as I continue President Nelson's challenge. I will also seek more of Christ's light and love in everything that I do. All that I am and all that I do should serve Christ in some way, and I need to focus on that important relationship as I go about my day every day.

Align Your Goals with God's Goals

• From Elder Ballard, I learned that God is a being of goals. He has goals for His kingdom, and He has goals for me. The most important goals He has set are for us to (1) return to Him and to (2) receive His exaltation, or all that He is and has. Elder Ballard encouraged us, as he has before, to have a personal progress interview with ourselves to evaluate how we are working to reach those goals. In particular, we should strive to realign our goals with God's goals, as can be found when we study His plan of happiness, when we study about Christ, and when we study about families.
• Elder Hales reminded us that discipleship is really apprenticeship. We are learning to become like God. Therefore, we should set similar goals to the ones God has set. He gave examples of goals, like crossing the road for anyone in need, living in moderation, and learning from all our experiences. When we have goals like God's, we begin to become like God.
• Elder Sabin encouraged us to "be all in," and to go beyond the minimum requirements of the gospel. He made me want to do good things like a boss (and I always imagine Leslie Knope and her enthusiastic drive when I think of being a boss).
• Elder Rasband told us what to do when God alerts us of His plan through a prompting. He said that we are to be First Responders, to arrive with lights flashing the instant God asks us to do something specific.
• Elder L. Whitney Clayton shared two similar responses from Mary in the scriptures, "Behold the handmaiden of the  Lord; be it unto me according to thy word." And, "Whatsoever he asks of thee, do it."
• Elder Bragg, as mentioned before, taught that the light of Christ is in all things. It gives life and purpose to all we do. As I plan my activities, I should seek the light of Christ in all that I do. I can find a way to build up the kingdom of God in every task.

I love setting goals. I am a Planner. When Elder Ballard started his talk, I felt giddy with excitement because I got to plan something. I've begun a study of my patriarchal blessing where I'm compiling a list of God's plan for me to reach our goals. I'm setting smaller goals to evaluate my progress along that plan, and I'm examining my temporal goals to see if they contribute to the kingdom of God. If everything I do leads me to be a better person and to improve the lives of people around me, I will truly "be all in." I'm also adding Mary's words to my prayers: "Behold the handmaiden of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word."

The Nelson Challenge: Tongue of Angels

I've been following President Nelson's challenge to study the words, actions, doctrines, prophecies, and commandments of Christ every week. Here is something I studied recently.

Lesson #2

Messengers in Christ's empty tomb.

2 Nephi 31:13, which continues to explain the Doctrine of Christ (the gift of the Holy Ghost, in particular), declares that "ye shall receive the Holy Ghost...and then can ye speak with the tongue of angels." The next verse refers to the tongue of angels as "a new tongue." So what does that mean? What exactly is the tongue of angels, and how does it fit into the bigger picture of the Doctrine of Christ?

2 Nephi 32:3 clarifies that "angels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost; wherefore they speak the words of Christ." So maybe the tongue of angels means that our words are directed to the hearts of the listeners, like the promptings of the Holy Ghost. To speak to someone's heart or feelings, you must know their heart. Sometimes that means that we can empathize or we have had similar feelings. But we are not perfect empathizers; we have finite mortal minds. God still knows all and Christ has felt all feelings and the Spirit thus empowers us to speak to the heart even when we personally don't understand. It is enough that Christ understands, and we can simply speak his words.

I also like the end of this verse: "wherefore, I said unto you, feast upon the words of Christ." Having the gift of the Holy Ghost does not automatically allow us to speak the words of Christ. We must contribute by studying the words of Christ. We need to give the Spirit material to work with. If the doctrine and wording and love of the Savior's teachings are always in our minds, it will be so much easier to share his words with others.

So, the content of the tongue of angels is the words of Christ. What about the delivery? In a regional conference a few years ago, President Nelson himself shared that angels are messengers. Think of every instance of an angel in the scriptures: that personage was there to share a message. Who else would like to share a brief message with you? The missionaries! It follows, then, that one way to speak the tongue of angels is to spread the gospel through missionary work. Of course, Preach My Gospel has much to offer by way of instruction. Perhaps it is truly a manual on speaking "a new tongue."

Lastly, as far as my study went, I turned to Elder Holland's conference address, "Tongue of Angels." In this talk, he defined the tongue of angels as speaking with faith, hope, and charity. This kind of speech encourages and uplifts the listener. It is not biting or fiery but is bridled and sacred. I imagine that this speech requires a lot of thinking beforehand, probably even prayer so that the words are spoken with care and love. We are to be gentle and humble in our speaking. Similarly, the Savior speaks peace. The voice of the Spirit is still and small. We can learn a lot about divine speaking from their examples.

This study has made me think about my own speaking. Do I speak with the tongue of angels, or am I living below my privilege? How could I better bridle and temper my speech? Here is my plan to revise my actions:

1. Continue President Nelson's challenge and feast on the words of Christ.
2. Pray (when possible) before difficult or significant encounters, like sharing the gospel or working at the temple.
3. Listen to the Spirit when talking to someone one-on-one.
4. Be generous and honest with compliments.
5. Speak up to people and not down to them. In other words, speak to them as the gods and goddesses that their spirits are. As C.S. Lewis said, "the dullest, most uninteresting person you can talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship."

The Nelson Challenge: Baptism by Fire

In January, President Russell M. Nelson issued a challenge to the young adults of the Church: to take time each week to study Christ's actions, words, laws, and doctrines as recorded in the scriptures. He recently wrote a blog post about how he fulfilled this very assignment. He included pictures of the notes he typed up and the markings in his Topical Guide.

As I am ever in search of a better way to study the scriptures, I have accepted this challenge. I confess to giggling with glee at the sight of President Nelson's scripture notes (so organized! so thorough!). I started by snatching the nearest copy of the Book of Mormon and searching for Jesus Christ in the index. There are several pages of entries for this subject, which is no surprise when you consider the Book of Mormon to be Another Testament of Jesus Christ. Anyway, I read a few snippets of verses right there in the index, and came across some interesting things that led me to deeper study.

Lesson #1

2 Nephi 31 covers the Doctrine of Christ from faith to repentance to baptism to the gift of the Holy Ghost and finally enduring to the end. I've heard these repeated over and over in Church lessons, but I wanted to go deeper and find a way to live the Doctrine of Christ better. I paused over the verses describing the gift of the Holy Ghost as a "baptism by fire." Why is the Holy Ghost so frequently compared to fire? I mean, the Spirit of God like a fire is burning. But why?

Feel the burn.

We know that the Holy Ghost is a cleansing agent, meaning that the Holy Ghost purifies us in the same vein as the washing of baptism. Fire burns away impurities (think refiner's fire) and is often associated with ordinary things becoming holy (think Moses' burning bush). Fire also produces light, which is associated in the scriptures with glory and truth and intelligence. After all, Christ is the light of the world. So, the Holy Ghost can make us holy and more like the Savior.

I also associate the Holy Ghost with receiving inspiration from God. The word "inspiration" contains the root "spirare," from which we also get the word "spirit." Inspiration literally means to breathe into. Breathing is what gives us life; therefore, inspiration is God giving us life, both physically and spiritually. We breathe oxygen, and what else needs oxygen to endure? Fire. The Holy Ghost ties us to the life-giving force that is our Heavenly Father.

Application: if you are feeling less than holy, seek the fire of the Holy Ghost. Create circumstances around yourself that invite the Holy Ghost to be your constant companion and, like the missionaries, never go anywhere without that companion. Seek inspiration more. Seek it in better ways. Ask questions as you study the scriptures. Set down the electronic device that consumes your quiet moments and reach out to the Spirit instead. Be still. Breathe. Burn.

February Favorites

1. Star Trek Trexels

This addictive mobile game is just what my Trekkie heart needed. Basically, you are an admiral in charge of staffing a Federation starship. You have to produce resources and spend them on away missions, training officers, and building rooms to make the ship function better. My favorite feature is the ability to add characters from the various Star Trek shows to your ship. My new goal in life is to recreate Voyager within this game. Plus, I play the role of an admiral. Help, I think I've died and gone to Star Trek Heaven.

2. Women and Entrepreneurship

I attended a lecture this month hosted by the Women's Services and Resources office at BYU. Jeanette Bennett, co-founder and editor of several Utah Valley magazines, spoke to us about how her experience as an educated mother drove her to start her own company. She gave us 11 tips on how to succeed and reach our dreams.

• Be positive. See the good.
• Be persistent. "Do the thing or bust!"
• Be passionate. Lose track of time because you love the work you do.
• Be excellent. Be hard to replace.
• Be present wherever you are. Minimize distractions.
• Don't take life too seriously.
• Defy logic if it's right for you. Act on revelation.
• Communicate with kindness.
• Feed your soul.
• Be you!
• Trust the Lord.

I never wanted to start a business before, but now I'm giving it serious thought. This line of thinking brings me to my next favorite...

3. The Oregon Trail Card Game

I love games, clearly. Never have I been so close to winning without actually winning, and that distinction is what I love so much about this game! Gameplay is similar to the computer games of ancient yore, with a few exceptions. There are a few things I would have adapted differently from the original games, which only makes me seriously consider starting a game-making business.

4. Recent Changes to My Calling

Why is this unusual subject one of my February favorites? Because attending the training kind of lit of fire in my brain. I walked away with renewed motivation, clear purpose, and new ideas on how to be a better Temple and Family History missionary. That's right: one of the main changes in my stake is that my committee members are now labeled as missionaries, which is exactly what we are for the dead. I have so many ideas to spread the spirit of Elijah; I'll keep you updated on what works.

5. Asset Enrichment Service

A post showed up on my Facebook feed the other day and it directed me to a service opportunity I had never heard of. A few years ago, the Church put out a call for user submissions of writing, art, and photography. Now that they have received thousands of submissions, the Church needs help tagging these resources for people to easily find and use. Basically, you are given a photo with a title and description, and you get to suggest tags that may apply to the photo. It's incredibly easy and fast, but it's clearly a massive project. Crowdsourcing only works with a crowd, right?

Also, as I took the screenshot for this blog post, I couldn't help myself. I had to tag a few pictures before I returned to blogging. It's a little addicting.

6. Writing Excuses Podcast

Because I spend so much time listening to audiobooks, I rarely listen to podcasts. However, the Writing Excuses podcast is the one I return to again and again. The presenters are concise, funny, honest, and brilliant (though they claim to be "not that smart" at the beginning of every podcast). They give excellent advice and writing prompts. When I'm in a writing slump, I simply listen to a single episode of Writing Excuses, and it rekindles my passion for writing.

Sunday Thoughts: Verse

I was recently reading through selected writings of John Rosenberg, former dean of the College of Humanities at BYU, when I came across some interesting etymology. I give all credit to Dr. Rosenberg for pointing this information out.

The word "verse" comes from the Latin root "vertere," meaning "to turn or change direction." When we finish singing a verse of a song, we turn back to the beginning and start again.

This root can also be seen in words like "versus," when people turn against each other, and "reverse," when we turn back in the other direction.

Most importantly, this root can be seen in the word "convert," to turn with someone. In gospel terms, we are truly converted when we turn with Christ, away from the world and toward goodness, righteousness, and eternal life. We change directions, and as President Uchtdorf pointed out in "A Matter of a Few Degrees," we should be making course corrections daily. We should become converted daily. When we err, we should become converted immediately.

Turn with Christ. Isn't that beautiful? And we have a reminder of it every time we sing multiple verses of a hymn.

Good Arguments

I recently had the opportunity to judge a writing contest on campus. Students submitted their best persuasive papers, and I got to read and evaluate 11 of these arguments. I was amazed at the sophistication of both topic choices and writing styles, but I was most impressed by the rhetorical choices the writers made.

This experience got me thinking. We all need to make better rhetorical choices. In our era of instant distribution and charged emotions, it is easy to fire off an argument without thinking too much about who will read it and how they may respond. Through this writing contest, I got to read thoughtful arguments written by millennials, a generation often disparaged for being privileged with such technology and social media. My experience taught me that this generation is actually getting ready to take charge of the future in brilliant ways.

Lessons from millennial rhetoric, or ways to improve your own arguments:

1. Do not spray audience repellent.
To use another insect analogy, you catch more flies with honey. The challenge in arguing is that your audience initially disagrees with you. In some circumstances, they might even be referred to as "the enemy." But your goal in arguing is to remove that misnomer and replace it with "friend." Insulting your audience will not encourage them to believe you or agree with you or befriend you. Instead, identify with your audience and acknowledge their concerns as valid.

2. Appeal to your audience's emotions.
As logical as we like to think we are, we are highly emotional people, especially when trying to persuade each other. Use your word choice, tone, and personal experiences to steer the emotions in a direction favorable to your case. The best papers I read for this contest were structured around the extreme trials of the writers. They elicited my sympathy and, in a twist of logic, proved that they know what they're talking about. Don't underestimate emotions.

3. Serve your audience.
The most powerful argument that I read was basically trying to convince the audience that life will be okay after a loved one dies. This claim brings to mind the baptismal covenant to "mourn with those that mourn [and] comfort those that stand in need of comfort" (Mosiah 18:9). Above all, your argument should serve your audience. I think if you start with that motivation, the Spirit will guide you to say what needs to be said. Your rhetoric will be cleaner, kinder, and more effective. Don't make the audience be the servant; be the servant yourself.

Now, go out into the world and argue. We need arguments in order to discover both truth and Truth (doctrine). We need to know how to make a point without harming someone. We need arguments to collaborate, to get things done, to improve the world. So argue, and argue well.

Lessons from Moana: "But This Does Not Define You"

When I saw Moana in the theater, I sat down front and was covered in salt water by the end of the movie. I blamed my condition on the beautifully animated ocean, but I was actually drowning in my own tears. The movie was sad and joyous and inspiring, and my eyeballs could not handle it. But my brain could! Here is my favorite lesson that I learned from Moana:

Bad things do not define you.

The whole concept of defining a person has interested me for a long time. I pay attention to how people identify themselves. I listen for the words, "I am." I am Bob, or I am tired, or I am the Avatar. Often, in a story, a character will identify themselves in several different ways before the end. Moana, in particular, learns her identity over the course of the movie (as a Disney protagonist should) and then something interesting happens. She discovers the true identity of someone else.

There be soft spoilers in this territory.

Moana sees beyond the scary exterior of an antagonist and sings a chilling song as she realizes what is going on. Speaking of the villain's monstrous appearance, she sings, "But this does not define you. This is not who you are."

The gospel has a similar message. It teaches us that we are eternal beings who lived before this existence and who will live after it. We came from Divinity and we will return to Divinity. But sometimes it is hard to remember that. We lose sight of our true identity and make mistakes. We may even be viewed as monsters. Villains. Bad guys. Sometimes bad things happen to us even when we're doing good things, and they distract us from our potential and our goal. We become antagonists to ourselves. When that happens, we could learn from Moana: This is not who you are. Bad things do not define us.

Instead, how are we defined? Another song provides the answer: I am a Child of God.

So, why don't bad things define us? Whether we are guilty or innocent, don't bad things change us, twist us, transform us? They may alter our perception or our temporary circumstances, but nothing can change our core definition as children of God, as recipients of heavenly and powerful and divine love. Like with physical DNA, our spiritual DNA cannot be undone. Our parentage cannot be reversed. What can be reversed are our mistakes and distractions, the deviance from course. Because of Christ, we can shed our monstrous disguises and become who we were designed to become. He is the source of our hope and the reason we can say, "This does not define me."

January Favorites

1. The new Nanowrimo Goal Trackers!

I'm back in the writing game thanks to this simple feature of the Nanowrimo website that allows me to set a writing goal and track my progress--outside of November! I've wanted this function for years, and I am pleased with its customizable elements. I chose to track my writing hours as I revise (since word count during revision fluctuates significantly), and even though I am currently behind in my hours, I like what I see.

2. An old love, Star Trek: Voyager

I came to the Voyager game way late, but better late than never. As a child, I watched Next Generation occasionally, but I really got the Star Trek spin-offs when I discovered them on Netflix. Voyager is by far my favorite spin-off: a female captain with quirks and flaws, a crew of diverse ethnicities and alien races, a dramatic tale of being lost in space--this show has it all!
2a. Some favorite episodes: Season 3.25 "Worst Case Scenario," Season 2.21 "Deadlock," and Season 4.18 & 4.19 "The Killing Game, Parts 1 and 2"

3. A new love, One Day at a Time

This Netflix sitcom is about family, and I am a sucker for shows about family. I am also a sucker for shows that provide insight into a different demographic. In this case, Cuban-Americans play on center stage, allowing me to consider what I have in common with them and what their unique strengths and struggles are. Plus, Rita Moreno. What more could I want?

4. Community Involvement a la Parks and Rec

I recently finished rewatching Parks and Recreation for the hundredth time (or so), and Leslie Knope always gets me fired up to be more involved in my community. Also, certain current events are getting me fired to be more involved in local government. So, I am now a volunteer at the Orem Public Library. I had to visit the Orem Police Department and City Center for the first time in order to apply for the volunteer position, and it was neat to walk past the City Council chambers and see the Orem seal lit up in a dark room. Anyway, I repair books so that (1) the city can save money on replacing books and (2) the children of my community can read and learn and grow. Plus, I get to be around books more. 5 out of 5 stars, would recommend.

5. Roasted Baby Carrots

I don't like raw carrots. Ever since I was a baby, I have had an odd reaction to something in carrots. It's almost like eating extremely sour food. HOWEVER. I discovered this month that I enjoy roasted baby carrots. It would probably be regular carrots, too, but I am too lazy to chop them up into bite-size chunks. Baby carrots come in smaller quantities and smaller chunks. Just sprinkle some salt, onion powder, and garlic over them and pop them into the oven for about 30 minutes. Delicious!

6. Mary Poppins musical

BYU put on a production of the Mary Poppins musical, which I saw in 2010 on the Broadway tour in Atlanta. I loved it the first time, partly because of the special effects: people and kites fly, and a certain chimney sweep tap dances on the ceiling. I thought BYU would not have the means to incorporate that level of effect, but I was wrong. They did a great job! Also, "Feed the Birds" always makes me cry. Also also, I want to be as confident as Mary Poppins when I grow up. After all, the song "Practically Perfect" is her singing about how perfect she is, "so people say."

A House of Learning - March

This is a little late, thanks to rampant technology problems, but I did so many things in March to make my house a house of learning!

1. Adjunct Dinner

I went to a fun, networking, celebratory dinner for the adjunct faculty of the English department. Aside from eating delicious food, I made some new friends among my co-workers. When I meet new people, I try to learn something from them, so I asked these lovely ladies to give me foreign language movie recommendations. Foreign movie marathon this summer?

2. Reading Series

The student readings were amazing. The university has lots of impressive talent in short essays, short stories, and poetry. I was inspired to write more for my Roxana Roy ghost story.

3. Stake Conference

Among the many things I gleaned from stake conference, foremost in my mind is the importance of waiting. Waiting is faith. Waiting is instruction. Waiting is, therefore, sacred.

I also learned to stop attending meetings and to start attending revelatory sessions. I got really excited about rebranding my meetings, especially since I have been experiencing adulthood burnout.

4. Face to Face

Elder Holland, Sister Stephens, and Elder Hallstrom kindly dropped some truth bombs into my lap, and I had a great time gathering with my neighbors to watch.

5. Women's Services Keynote: "Claiming Your Education" by Susan Madsen

From Dr. Madsen, I learned a lot about the ways in which Utah women fall behind the rest of the nation in percentages of college graduates. Many women feel that education is emphasized in Utah culture, but graduating from college is not part of that emphasis. Higher education actually benefits women in terms of economics, health and well-being, civic and community engagement, parenting, intellectual and cognitive skills, and self-development. So how do we help more women graduate? We can help them save money for college, visit college campuses, apply for and receive scholarships, and take AP courses. We need to encourage girls very early to obtain a college degree.

I applied this to my relationships with my cousins and my nieces (and nephews), so I am going to be talking up my college degree and bringing my family members to campus as often as I get a chance.

6. Mormon Insights contest submission

I submitted a piece of writing to a writing contest! I did not win, but I was proud of myself for finishing a project and submitting it. It's time to get back into that swing of things.

7. Education in Zion lecture: "My Journey as a Scholar of Faith" by Jini Roby

Dr. Roby spoke of her upbringing in war-torn Korea. She lived with her grandmother in a remote village where she learned as a survival mechanism, then as a love, then as a way to give back to her world. She outlearned her village teachers and, through a series of sacrifices on both her and her grandmother's parts, eventually made her way to Seoul for school. Unfortunately, she had to part ways with her grandmother, who couldn't survive in Seoul, so Dr. Roby lived in an orphanage. She was eventually adopted by a family in Utah, and now she does humanitarian research and work so that children do not have to suffer as she (and many others) did.

I loved hearing her story, so different from my own--though we both share a passion for, a relationship with, learning.

8. Chair of a panel for English Symposium (YA Lit)

I volunteered for the BYU English Symposium as a chair for the YA literature panel. I learned a lot from the presenters, all of whom were students reporting on original research they had done in their English and English Education majors. Topics ranged from cover art to the prominent trope of blacking out.

9. First 50 Years of Relief Society lecture

I bought a book so that I could see Eliza R. Snow's notes from her service as the Relief Society secretary. NERD.

10. Wu Man concert

Wu Man performed on a Chinese stringed instrument called the pipa, an onomatopoeia for the sound it makes. She was very personable and informative as she talked between pieces, and the music itself was so unique. I recommend looking her up on Youtube if you want a taste of the pipa.

11. International Cinema: The Cave of Forgotten Dreams

You guys. Werner Herzog took a documentary crew into an ancient cave and talked about what it means to be human, to make art, to have dreams. It was amazing. Highly, highly recommend.

12. Taste of Sunrise

This play was performed in ASL and speech, and several of the actors were deaf or hard of hearing. Sign language can be so dramatic and evocative--I loved watching the actors more so than in any other play. And also, I left the performance in tears.


I did several other things in March, but they will have to be in a separate post. I'm exhausted! Cheers!

Studying the Scriptures

I confess: I have an obsession with scripture study--specifically, with studying the Book of Mormon. I've compiled some of the methods I use to make the scriptures more meaningful, and at the end I have also included some methods my friends have used.

1. Word Search

This practice stemmed from two desires: (a) to read the Book of Mormon quickly to see the big picture, and (b) to learn more about the ways certain words appear in the Book of Mormon. I bought a cheap copy, picked a word/phrase/concept, and set to work. I read quite speedily, pausing only to hover over the word I had selected for that round. When I found the word, I highlighted it and made a mental note about the context it appeared in. At first, I read for "light." When I finished, I started over, reading for every instance of "faith." I colored faith orange to represent the fire of faith, and I discovered that the simple book of Enos was burning bright.

2. Word Search ON STEROIDS: Dedicated to a Single Topic

A couple of years ago, I spent a long time thinking about hope, about how I needed hope. So I bought yet another cheap copy of the Book of Mormon and turned it into my Hope - Book Of Mormon. Not only did I highlight every instance of the word "hope," but I also began feeling hope every time God's promises and covenants were mentioned. I highlighted those, too. And on the flyleaf at the beginning of the book, I wrote down my favorite thoughts on hope: a poem  by Emily Dickinson, and the greatest two hopeful scriptures I could think of, Moroni 7:41 and Alma 32:21. After that read-through, I feel like I an expert on hope.

3. Cross Reference

This practice is by far the most tedious. I have yet to complete a thorough reading of the Book of Mormon using cross referencing, but the concept is simple enough. As I read, I find a gospel topic and research it using conference talks. When I find a talk with a relevant quote or message, I write the quote down and stick it into the chapter, being careful to trim the sticky note so that it doesn't cover up the actual text. The writing and trimming take forever, but I have learned a lot about applying the scriptures to my modern lifestyle. It also helps to boil down a complicated chapter to a few key gospel topics.

4. Foreign Language Edition

I love languages. I love the Book of Mormon. So, when I was learning Spanish in college, I combined these two loves and bought myself El Libro de Mormón. Reading familiar scriptures in a new language is an eye-opening experience--the language suddenly begins to make sense. I became more aware of the struggle of translating scripture. I quickly memorized 1 Nefi 3:7, and years later, I can still recite it with the same lyrical rhythm. Reading the Book of Mormon in Spanish gave me a confidence in the language, but it also gave me a confidence in my testimony. The Spirit is with the book, no matter what language it is written in (which wasn't English to begin with).

5. Suggestions from Elsewhom

I got these study methods from the awesome members of my Relief Society. Clearly, I read too selfishly; most of these suggestions include sharing what you read with someone else. I'm definitely going to develop one of those suggestions so that I can reach out and truly apply my scripture study.

• Companion study: read the scriptures with someone else and discuss the text
• Teach the scriptures: read with the intent to teach someone, particularly someone of another faith
• Scripture speak: read the scriptures out loud
• Wake up with the scriptures: study first thing in the morning to dedicate your day to God
• Imagine the scriptures: put yourself into the story to make it come alive
• The Bednar approach: like the word search except searching for answers to a single question while reading
• Interrogate the scriptures: read with questions in mind and write down answers and revelation
• Where's Christ?: like Where's Waldo? except you're searching for Christ's role 
• Word search with the Young Women values: a great adaptation of my word search method
• Reach out: read with specific people in mind and make note of verses that could help uplift them
• Share!: the scriptures are a gift, so study and then share what you learn (or maybe even share the scriptures themselves)
• Scripture prescriptions: find scriptures to read when you're happy, when you're sad, when you're anxious, when you're sick, when you're confused, etc. and write out prescriptions with the verses included (can be personal or given to someone else)

A House of Learning - February

1. Theatre

I attended an adaptation of my favorite Shakespeare comedy, Twelfth Night. I have a problem (read: obsession) when it comes to stories about women dressing up as men to move through society more easily. The BYU Young Company did a great job setting the classic story in the wild American West, as well as simplifying the story for an audience of children. I thoroughly enjoyed the music and the audience interaction--it seemed very authentic for a Shakespeare performance.

2. Weekly reading series

Ashley Seitz-Kramer, a Utah poet, read some great poems to us from her collection Museum of Distance, which I later purchased out of awe. She is not only an inspirational writer, but she turned her reading into an art. She taught me the importance of the pause and the silence before reading, when we let the air clear itself of past words and we breathe in and pause to wait for and hunger for more words.

I also heard some poems by a former Utah poet, Wyn Cooper. He read a few postcard poems--poems that are written as notes to people or things or places or emotions or places of mind. He taught me to have fun with poetry, to make poetry accessible to its readers. He also talked a bit about the writing process of a poet. Many poets edit a poem after they publish it; thereby, the poem becomes a constantly evolving, living work. Cooper also explained something about Joyce Carol Oates: she was always attached to a typewriter. She would bring it in the car and write on long drives, and she would even have several typewriters lined up at home, each with a different project she was working on. When she got bored with one, she would move down the line to the next.

3. Art lecture 

At a lecture on campus, local artist James Christensen discussed 24 of his paintings featuring fascinating female figures. I've had this painting ("Virtue") in my bedroom, and I didn't even know it was his. 

I love art with a high contrast between light and dark, especially when the light is warm, a practice called tenebrism. Anyway, the artist himself was friendly, funny, and personable. He used to be a bishop in my stake, so my stake building is full of his work. His art is inspiring, whimsical, and narrative.

4. Fireside

I attended a fireside about the archaeology of Ancient America and learned tons about the Adena and Hopewell cultures and their parallels to the Book of Mormon. The presenter made a great case arguing that the Adena people could be the Jaredites and the Hopewell could be the Nephites and Lamanites. Even if that isn't true, his message helped me to understand that the Book of Mormon is real. There's no reason why those people shouldn't have left traces behind them. And now, when I read the Book of Mormon, everything is more tangible.

I definitely have never learned so much about the inhabitants of my own country. That part of history gets skipped over for the more culturally significant Aztecs, Olmecs, and Mayans.

5. Women's Services lecture: Beauty Redefined

The BYU Women's Service office hosted a lecture by media and body image professors (and twin sisters), Lexie Kite and Lindsay Kite. Here are some insights I got from the Drs. Kite: 

• Stop talking about only looks when complimenting others, especially on social media.
• Stop self-objectifying (thinking about being looked at). 
• Resist these habits with mental might, physical fortitude, social skillfulness, and spiritual strength.
• Your body is an instrument for you to use, not an ornament.
• Be more than just a body. In return, see others as more than just bodies.

6. Temple tours

The Provo City Center Temple offered tours during February, and I was able to go on two tours. The first was the bridal tour, and they walked groups of single women through the bridal room and up the tall, twisting staircase to a sealing room, where the sun was setting just behind a stained glass window. It was truly gorgeous. Divine. The second tour took us through the rest of the temple, which was small but ornate. With all the authentic workmanship, I felt like I was stepping into the 1920s.

7. BOOKS

In February, I read 6 books and listened to 1 audiobook (Pride and Prejudice). I went on a Louise Plummer and Carol Lynch Williams kick, and it was a glorious kick. I have met both women and found them kindred spirits. Their writing makes me want to write volumes.

College of Humanities - Feast!

The College of Humanities at BYU turned 50 years old this past year, and in typical academic fashion, we celebrated with a fine feast and a book release. The college was founded in 1965, so we were encouraged to dress in 60s fashion--and if there's anything I enjoy, it's dressing up outside of my time and reality. The previous dean published a collection of his writings, and we all got a free copy. It's gorgeous and full of spiritual insights. Oh, and also I won an orchid. It matched my dress.

My evening in one image.

The best part of the evening was being introduced to the newest department in the college: Art History. Each faculty member chose a piece of art that represented their work and somehow commemorated the number 50. They only spoke briefly, but I tasted that sweet nectar of an art history lecture and I wanted more.

The newest faculty member taught us about depictions of the Veil of Veronica, a Catholic legend of a woman who wiped Christ's sweaty, bloodstained face on his way to Calvary. The cloth she used retained the image of Christ's face, just as we are to retain Christ's image in our countenances, his example in our hearts. 

Creepy, yet inspirational?

So, happy birthday, College of Humanities! I enjoyed both the physical and intellectual food at your party, and I am so proud to be a (teeny tiny) part of your legacy.

A House of Learning - January

I did a lot of things in January to establish my home as "a house of learning." Most of these things were super free.

1. Ice skating

I don't do a lot of physical learning, but when the opportunity presents itself, I'm all game. Though I have ice skated before, I always struggle to get started again. Usually, I spend all my time thinking through the laws of physics and how I can speed up and slow down and turn and not fall over. My friends giggled at me because every time they skated past I was bending my knees, hunkering down, and whispering, "Physics, physics, physics."

2. International cinema

I attended a showing of a 1925 silent Danish film called Master of the House. It was a great picture about a man learning compassion for his wife and sharing the chores. But Mads, his former nanny, was by the far the best character. See her here, overlooking the love that she has encouraged.

The literal translation of the title is Thou Shalt Honor Thy Wife.

Go, 1925!

3. Organization workshop

I went to an organization workshop at my library one Thursday night, and while I was definitely the youngest and most single person in the room, I learned a lot about managing my things, including such tips as only keep collectible items that you can easily display (minimally) and collect containers to put things in. This education was an important part of my 2016 resolution to establish a house of order! And, of course, it was totally free.

4. Weekly devotional/forum

Every Tuesday, I watched the campus devotional. I learned about building divine relationships by being both a learner and a lifter, about seeking to know truth by study and faith and context, and about using my fears as opportunities to exercise faith and good works. In the forum by Liz Wiseman, I learned about being a multiplier, or someone who increases the intelligence of those around them by providing chances to learn and try and grow. And I learned to give myself such chances, too. I'm also including President and Sister Nelson's worldwide devotional here, too, where I learned about the true definition of being a millennial and preparing the kingdom of God for Christ's return.

Ghost helped me take notes.

5. Weekly reading series

Every Friday, I attended a reading on campus. I go to readings to hear the beautiful sounds of words and to collect trinkets of inspiration and motivation for my own writing. The first reading was performed by Brent Newsom, a poet who did wonderful things with narrative as the poems shared glimpses of a small town. The second reading came from Joni Tevis, a delightful essayist whose attention to detail and unusual settings ignited ideas in my mind. Seriously, all my notes from her reading are notes for my own stories. The third reading was the most radical: Craig Dworkin read a poem that made me fall in love with my language all over again. He read through dictionary definitions of words, and then dictionary definitions of the words in those definitions, and so on and so on, several layers in. The perfect language would not be so complicated. A single word would be its own definition. But the imperfection of English makes it so rich and beautiful.

5. BOOKS

This year, I set a 25-book goal for my Goodreads challenge. I've read 13 books so far. Whoops! Perhaps I should have set my sights higher. Regardless, I have loved every book.

All books appear here except one: the audiobook I listened to.

I read one picture book, two graphic novels, four novels, four memoirs, and one book of essays, and then I listened to a Charles Dickens audiobook.